Will Power

I didn't buy a pregnancy test today!! Believe me, I WANTED to, but I didn't. My period is due in 3 days, and I just can't stand it. I"ve bought tests every other month and tested before my period. Of course, to no avail. And I always get upset, so I decided that I would NOT get one this time and just wait for my period. If it's late, THEN I'll buy one. NOT SOONER. I looked at them today, but I did not buy! yay for me!
It was really hard, because we tried something different this month and we are really hoping we get pregnant. We tried this lubricant called "Pre-seed" that is for people trying to get pregnant. Apparently regular lube is harmful to sperm, so this lube is supposed to not harm them and help along. I'm hoping this is the thing we've been missing, but I'm really trying to not get my hopes up. Thus, the reason for no pregnancy test.
Also why we are hoping this time we get pregnant, aside from the obvious, is this month marks the anniversary of our first pregnancy. So, if we don't get pregnant, that means I have to start going to the doctor and doing tests to see if there is a reason why we haven't had a second pregnancy. Boo.
But in the mean time, I 've been super crafty and now I'm off to continue to occupy my time with  craftiness!

Legs in the Air! ( no this is not in reference to syncronized swimming)

So, this weekend was my ovulation time, according to my handy dandy ovulation kit. Of course, I'm starting to doubt this little kit since I haven't gotten pregnant, but we'll see. I seriously think I layed in bed with my legs in the sky for like, 30 minutes! lol, I was playing words with friends and googling things, so I'm not really sure how long it was, but it was a long time!!! Those little spermies had plenty of time to wiggle their little butts to their destination! Now let's just hope they weren't too tired to tunnel their way through it!
I scheduled my doctor's appt for Aug 4 at 10:30am, hopefully I'll get some answers, or reassurance, or something. Even a lollipop would be nice at this point. Or maybe I'll find out I'm preggo!
We are heading off to my best friend's wedding on Wed. morning, so I am super, super pumped about that, and I can't wait to lay on the beach with a cold drink. Should it be sans-alcohol or not??? Hmmm......I'll have to think about that. I wish there was a way to tell if you're pregant like, the next day. That would be fabulous!! In preparation for the wedding, I purchased a Groupon for a $20 airbrush tan in Frisco. So, I am going up there Tuesday to get it!! Im excited about that too, considering I'm casper white and will be standing next to bride who looks like a mexican, she is so stinkin' tan!! And not to mention my dress is "tangerine," not a great color for pale skin.. So hopefully the airbrusher will give me a great tan! I will let you know how that turns out..
Nite!

This is starting to sound familiar.....

Well, my friend did indeed come this past weekend. I am so thankful though that I was able to be distracted by 8 teenagers and a 13 hour drive to Colorado for our church's youth mission trip. I must say that even though I was looking forward to the trip, I was a little aprehensive of spending a week with a group of 14-18 year olds!! As always, God had his hand in my decision to be a chaparone for the trip. I so needed that trip!! And spending it with a bunch of teenagers was such a blessing in disguise. I had a blast and didn't even have time to feel sorry about my circumstances. Those kids I spent the week with are truely great kids, and I am lucky to have been able to get to know them. I hope they continue to grow and be successful young adults.
Anyway, I will be scheduling an appt with my doctor tomorrow, so hopefully I can get in soon so she can reassure me that nothing is wrong....or tell me that something is wrong. I just need a conversation with a professional, I think. That will make me feel a little more at ease I think. Until then, I will continue to converse with God and myself..and relax.

Negative

Well, second pregnancy test was negative, also. So, I guess we'll wait and see if my little friend appears this weekend! I really hope it doesn't. Not only because I want to be pregnant, but also because I will be going on our church's Youth mission trip to Colorado Sunday for the week, and I don't want to have to deal with 8 teenagers on my period!!! aaaaggg!!! I think I need to make sure I get the extra large size Ibuprofen if indeed I end up having my period!
On another note, I have a very good friend, Sarah Miles, who has the blog MilesandMilestogo, who is expecting a baby girl soon!!! I am so excited for her and even more excited that she has picked an Owl theme for her nursery!!! I love owls and especially love all the owl baby paraphenalia! So, even though I am having a difficult time getting my own baby, I can live vicariously (but not creepy, stalkerish) through her and her soon-to-be owl loving baby girl!!
Btw, I did not eat the cake balls in my fridge. Score! But I am about to go have a bite of banana pudding. Peace!